Jenny Louise Sykes

My beautiful daughter, Jenny Louise Sykes, died on 12 July 2006, aged 13.
Jenny was an adorable little girl. She was full of fun, a dizzy blonde, who would do silly things, and had the ability to laugh at herself, and light up the lives of the people around her.
She loved humour, and would recite scripts from Little Britain and the Catherine Tate show.

She loved her family and friends so much, and would do anything for them. She loved children, especially her little brother, and her little cousins, and my friends\' children.
She was very popular at school, and had many friends, boys and girls.

Jenny\'s carefree spirit changed in November 2005. A friend at school, Paul Moran, was found hanged in his bedroom by his mum. He had been bullied at school (not by Jenny). Paul has a page on this site. Please light a candle for a special boy.
A light in Jenny\'s life went out. She had always been a very sensitive child, who couldn\'t bear to hear on the news or in the papers about any suffering, especially if it related to a child. I remember how Hollie and Jessica\'s deaths really affected her deeply, though she did not know them.
I think that Paul\'s death brought home to her the fact that tragedies could happen to people you know. They are not confined to people you read about in the paper.

From that day, I had problems with Jenny. She was in trouble at school. I referred her to counsellors, as did her school. She knew how upset I was, and told me it was a phase she was going through and that it would be ok. But, she played truant, was late home at night, and was smoking.
I was so worried. The counsellors had discharged her, saying she didn\'t have any serious problems.
Eventually it got better. She became happier again. I was getting my little girl back ....... or so I thought.
On the 11th July 2006 she spent the whole evening with her little brother, playing in the garden with him. They were laughing and squealing. They adored each other. When I shouted them in as it was getting late, they had supper and went to bed.

The following morning, I found Jenny dead in her bedroom. She had died the same was as her friend Paul. There was no note.

I am and always will be, absolutely heartbroken by Jenny\'s death.
The police came and took away \"evidence\" from her bedroom - diaries, the house computer, notes, letters\", and the next few days were a blur of trying to fend off the press with a police guard on the door, and trying to face up to the reality of what had happened.

Jenny left 3 brothers, Chris, Mark and Matthew, and 2 sisters, Laura and Sophie, who, along with the rest of her family, are all absolutely devastated, and dozens and dozens of heartbroken friends.

At her funeral, the church was packed to the rafters. I was so proud. 13 of her friends lit candles to commemorate each year of her life.
I was approached by people who I didn\'t know, but who knew Jenny really well, and they all said they felt honoured to have known her. I found out that she often helped an elderly neighbour, by running errands for her. I was so proud to hear such wonderful things about my little girl.
A donation of £1200 from well-wishers was made to NSPCC in her memory.

We had to wait for 7 months for the inquest, which was very traumatic. We heard evidence that Jenny had been subjected to some bullying on MSN - someone had said to her that everyone wanted her dead. This obviously preyed on her mind, but she never told me about it, and I will never understand why, as we had a good relationship.
The inquest also heard that Jenny became a different person when her friend died. She could not cope with the grief. She had made a shrine to him, hidden in the wardrobe where we couldn\'t see.
The inquest also heard that Jenny was prone to sleep-walking, and the estimated time of death, coupled with the fact that she had left no notes, suggested that she may have accidentally killed herself in a disturbed sleep pattern.

The truth is, we will never know the real reason until we see her again. What we do know is that it was an accident. Luckily, the coroner gave a verdict of accidental death, which supported our belief.

There are so many questions which remain unanswered though.
But, I get some comfort from the fact that nothing can hurt her anymore. She certainly could not have coped with hearing about little Madeleine McCann\'s disappearance.

So many children have died just lately, that I believe my Jenny was chosen to go to heaven to look after all these children.
If you are reading this and you have lost a child, you can rest assured that Jenny will have taken your son or daughter under her wing.

I have tried to keep busy by focusing on jenny\'s siblings. Jenny\'s sister Laura was pregnant when Jenny died. She had a beautiful baby boy, Josh, whom Jenny would have adored.

The truth is, it is so difficult to carry on when you have lost your child. I never appreciated that before I experienced it. But what you don\'t realise, is just how many mums and dads there are who have experienced it also.

I have been helping a local charity, called Donna\'s Dream House, which provides free holidays in Blackpool for terminally ill children, a charity which Jenny would have loved to support. They also run a support centre for bereaved parents, which has helped me loads. I, along with my daughter Sophie and 2 of my friends, Helen and Bernie, have just done a parachute jump and raised nearly £4500 for the charity. Jenny was a real daredevil, and I was always a wimp when it came to white knuckle rides, so I decided to do a parachute jump to make her proud. I hope it did.


Now, I watch for signs from Jenny. People often see signs from their deceased loved ones, and for me, Jenny\'s signs are butterflies. I could write a book about the strange incidents that have happened relating to butterflies, often at times when I am at my lowest.

The following verse appears on Jenny\'s gravestone:-

\"A butterfly lights before us like a sunbeam
And for a brief moment it\'s beauty and glory belong to our world.
But then it flies on.
And though we wish it could have stayed,
We feel grateful to have seen it\".


Jenny was my precious butterfly. She was my world, and my heart will ache until the day I hold her in my arms again.

Angie.

xx